A single mom, but not for real——-
According to dictionary.com, basically the definition of the word single is as follows:
sole, lone, solitary, by itself/oneself, alone, unaccompanied, unsupported by others
I’ve come to realize quite a few things as a single mom. Among those things this one stands out…
I may be single, but I’m definitely not alone, unaccompanied or unsupported—-
My support system consists of…
(1)my 22 year old daughter (2)Runaway Nun #2 (3) my mom (4)my older brother (5)my younger brother and (6) my daughters’ godmother
Recently we celebrated my 98 pound chocolate Lab, Lucca’s, sixth birthday. I refer to him as my boy because he is such a big part of our family- he loves us and we love him. We had a full fledged birthday party for him, complete with party hats, decorations and a piñata. In a not- so- brilliant move, I gave him one of those foot long Wal Mart bones as a gift. We also have a Morkie and a Yorkie Poo so I put my big guy in his room and put the baby gate up so that they wouldn’t disturb him (or be eaten by him) while he enjoyed his gift.
My 10 year old daughter and Lucca are extremely close. He often sleeps with/on her and I believe he would protect her with his own life. Here’s where things go bad…and my next not- so- brilliant move… I neglected to remind my little girl NOT to disturb him either. Well, she did and he snapped at her. Unfortunately, his snap was quicker than her jump back and he made contact with her face-with his teeth. Yes, he bit her in her face. He did one of those barking snaps, the kind that would normally serve as a warning (except she was too close and not fast enough to avoid his teeth). She let out a blood curdling scream and when I got to her she was in full panic/pain mode. Initially, I thought he’d merely frightened her, but the moment I saw the blood, I knew better. I immediately yelled at him and quarantined him to his kennel then I grabbed her and tried to console her and check her injuries. She was reluctant to let me get a good look at her face so I ushered her into the bathroom to get a better look and then decided to take her to the hospital to have it checked by a doctor. Before going to the hospital, Runaway Nun #2 vowed to join us as soon as she secured the house and the other dogs, and in my third and final not- so- brilliant move of the evening- I took my little girl to my mom’s house to get a second opinion. She took one look and told me to take her to the hospital.
I called my little girl’s godmother and she met us at the hospital. After checking in, I called my older daughter and told her what happened. She panicked, I calmed her down, then she asked if her little sister was ok (in about 15 different ways). When she was comfortable that she (her little sister) would survive, she asked if Lucca was ok. I assured her that the hospital visit was just a precautionary measure, that Lucca was home, kenneled and lucky to be alive- but alive, and I promised to call after we saw the doctor.
While waiting to see the doctor I received a call from my older brother. He had spoken with my mother and called to
1. ask if his niece was ok and
2. ask if I needed him to come home from the West coast and kill my dog
I calmly told him that
1. I was positive that she was fine and
2. I DID NOT need him to kill my dog
…things went downhill from there…..
Oh my little girl was, in fact, just fine. She suffered some superficial lacerations on her nose, upper lip and just under her eye. We waited over three hours in the ER to see a doctor and finally left without being seen; by then I’d had a chance to get a good look at her face and it was obvious that she didn’t need stitches (some warm soapy water to clean it and some antibiotic ointment, but no stitches).
The fact that we didn’t see a doctor went unchallenged but my unwillingness to either kill or get rid of Lucca became the hot (over heated) topic of the hour…day…and week! I received so many calls from my older brother that night that I stopped answering his calls. The next morning my younger brother called and gave me his advice – saying that obviously Lucca did not regard my little girl as an alpha figure in our house. He said that Lucca should see himself as #5 in the pecking order with the humans representing numbers one thru four. God knows I love that man and although I know Lucca’s a pretty smart fellow, I’ve never seen him count, so this piece of advice sort of fell on deaf ears.
Now on to my older brother-again…. he sent “nasty grams” to me and my older daughter over and over again throughout the next few days and he vowed to “hold us responsible” if Lucca ever injured my little girl again. He also said that “clearly” I wasn’t putting my little girl’s well-being ahead of my love for my dog. He told me (thru text message) to “get rid of the dog”—
God knows I love that man too and I know he’s brilliant and he loves my little girl but damn- NOBODY LOVES HER LIKE I DO- so I refused to allow him to make this kind of decision for me or to bullyrag me into doing something I would regret.
My little girl cried when I suggested we make Lucca an outside dog and when I told her that my older brother said we should get rid of him she said “he never had a dog or a pet”—-
I took her to her pediatrician the day after the bite for a tetanus shot and Lucca was up to date on all of his shots before the bite.
My older daughter asked my little girl if she is afraid of Lucca now and she said “a little” (I think it’s a healthy fear- she gives him his space when he’s eating and she avoids leaning over in his face- at all). Also, I monitor the two of them (like a hawk) when they’re around one another.
As a single mom I am truly blessed to have such a strong supportive- support system. I love each and every one of them with all my heart and I am so very grateful to God that they love me and my girls so much—-
P.S. these people are the reason that I am